i think i may be having the early symptoms of depression.
No, I am not overexaggerating.
It's not like my father or mother don't have it already - stress, anxiety, what not.
I have been influenced.
No I do not want to go to a councellor 'cos I am very aware of my
little self esteem and confidence
And I know everybody has a bit of that. But it seems to be constant and persistent for me.
Odd because it's normally caused by somebody putting pressure on you.
But nobody is pressuring me. I'm pressuring myself. I'm giving myself pressure. Things to achieve, things to expect.
I am totally and fully aware that I should think positive, simply do my best, forget about the others and that as long as I do that I have already succeeded. BLAH BLAH BLAH.
BUT I CAN'T CHANGE CAN I?
WHAT IS THIS?
WHAT ELSE COULD IT BE? OTHER THAN DEPRESSION?
CONSTANTLY PUTTING MYSELF DOWN.
CONSTANTLY BEING ANGRY (no not just the regular pmsing).
and with my introspective nature, it's not a surprise.
Fucking school, fuck everything. Just fuck.
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